17 May 2008

"Smells Like TBN Spirit"

A ripoff of the Nirvana song, inspired by the jackals featured every hour on TBN.

I saw this guy
On my TV
And he was staring
Straight at me
He said he'd heal
My disease
If I would send
Him money please

Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know don't know

Well he's yellin!
And he's screamin!
Could it be that
He's blasphemin?
Send him money
I don't wanna!
But he told me
That I gotta!
If I do and
God is willing
I'll find gold in
All my fillings!
Yeah!

As I wait for
My miracle
And migraines still
Pound in my skull
I must admit
The waiting's tough
Oh is my faith
Not strong enough?

Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know don't know

Dontcha dis the
Path I've chosen!
Even though the
Bank's foreclosin!
And my mortgage
I can't pay now!
"Money Comin!"
Any day now!
Though by sight you'd
Never guess it!
It'll come if
I confess it!
Yeah!

I pawned my watch
And sold my car
And I maxed out
My credit cards
But I know I'll
Get what I need
With one more
Thousand-dollar seed

Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know
Don't know don't know don't know

Brother Benny
Wants to help me!
If my checkbook
I will empty!
Send it in now!
No delayin!
In the Spirit
He's a-slayin!
Slingin' jackets!
Quotin' verses!
Calling down all
Kinds of curses!

Avanzini!
Pastor TD!
Creflo Taffy!
Stevie Munsey!
Kenny Benny!
Joyce and Jesse!
Drivin' Bentleys!
Charley Grassley!
Penitentiary!